Thursday, November 6, 2014

engg jokes2

[11/5, 9:44 PM] Tejas College: Aaj bahut busy day hai
Jokes on incredible Bangalore:

1. If you throw a stone randomly in Bangalore, chances are, it will hit a dog or a software engineer. While the dog may or may not have a strap (a.k.a. leash) around his neck, the software engineer will definitely have one.

2. In India we drive on the left of the road. In
Bangalore, we drive on what is left of the road.

3. Q: What is the easiest way of causing traffic accidents in Bangalore?
A: Follow the traffic rules.

4."A guy is house hunting in Bangalore. Meets old lady who is potential landlord. The conversation goes thus:

Old lady: Where do you work, son?
Guy (with an air of pompousness): I work in
Infosys.
Old lady: Oh, that bus company! Sorry, we rent only to good IT people.
It would appear that Infosys operates more
buses than BMTC in Bangalore."

5. Bangalore, where PG(Paying Guest) is the first business and IT, the second.

6. When someone says it is raining in
Bangalore, be sure to ask them which area,
which Main and which Cross.

7. if Bangalorean stops at a traffic light, others behind him stop too because The others conclude that he has spotted a policeman that they themselves have not.

8.Auto rickhsaw driver, grocery seller and
common shop keeper thinks that you earn at least 1 lakh per month if you are in IT sector.

9. Out of every 100 software engineers in
Bangalore, 90 are utterly frustrated and rest
have a girlfriend.

10. Bus drivers use horn instead of the brakes.

11. Since it's easier to find an alcohol shop
than a medicine shop in Bengaluru, the doctors have now started prescribing "dawa-daaru" for treatment.

12.Universal answer in Bangalore is "Gothilla"

[11/6, 4:20 PM] Shusruth Nagesh: Road Crossing Instructions in Pakistan

Look both right and left for cars, motorcycles, animals and pedestrians,

Look "up" for American drones.

Look "down" for bombs and land mines.

Look sideways and backwards for kidnappers and suicide bombers.

Hold your bags tight and watch for every person near you.

Then walk zigzag to avoid bullets.

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